Praise is Powerful in a Marriage

You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. 

I am a lucky man to have you for my wife.

I love you terribly. 

I love watching you sleep.

Your hair is amazing.

These are a few of the compliments that my late husband consistently said to me for the 12 years of our marriage. 

At the beginning of our relationship, I found myself doubting his words because the praise was over-the-top! Over time, I realized that Bill was consistent with his compliments and praise. I decided to trust him and believe his compliments were sincere. 

I decided to begin praising him in the same manner that he did.  

Our marriage flourished!  The "honeymoon phase" of our marriage did not fade away. I discovered that praise and compliments build you both up!

Do not let negative thoughts about your spouse live in your head. 

The minute you catch yourself thinking negatively, replace it with a positive thought. 

Make a commitment to keep your marriage strong.

Give your partner "over the top" compliments every. single. day. Tell them what you love and admire about them. Your relationship will deepen and grow. 

Trust in the Lord : Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all your heart

Trust. Believe He is taking care of everything. Have no doubt. Believe this 100%. Have no doubt.

And lean not on your own understanding

Do not do it my way. My way takes me out of His way. Have faith and do not try and deal with life on my own.

In all your ways acknowledge Him

Talk to Him. All. The. Time.  Say thank you for blessings. Ask for help in all things. That's not weakness. It's strength. Ask for guidance today in all things. Acknowledge that God is first in all my activities. Pray. Talk. Share.

And He shall direct your paths.

Shall means will. He will direct my paths. Right now. He is in charge. He is the director. I am not. 

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.

Proverbs 3:5-6 NKJV

How Long Do You Grieve a Personal Loss?

Grief is...
Grief expert David Kessler at Grief.com says"...grief is a process, a journey. It does not end on a certain day or date. It is as individual as each of us. Grief is real because loss is real. Each grief has its own imprint, as distinctive and as unique as the person we lost. The pain of loss is so intense, so heartbreaking, because in loving we deeply connect with another human being, and grief is the reflection of the connection that has been lost. Grief is not just a series of events, or stages or timelines. Our society places enormous pressure on us to get over loss, to get through the grief."But how long do you grieve for a husband of 12 years? A nephew who kills himself? A stillborn baby? A year? 5 years? Forever?

Grief and Loss
When your heart is broken, healing is a long process. In Genesis 37: 34 - 35, Jacob tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and mourned many days when he believed his son Joseph was dead. Joseph was his baby. Joseph was his favorite son. Jacob's other children tried to comfort him, but he wouldn't let them. He wanted to be with his dead son Joseph. I recognize that feeling.

After my husband Jack died, I just wanted to be left alone to mourn. Emotionally, I fluctuated back and forth through the different stages of grieving like a kite dipping and bobbing in the wind. Denial. Anger. Depression. Acceptance.
During Year 2 of widowhood, I stayed in anger and acceptance with depression kicking in on our anniversary and holidays. In the fall of that year, I had a relapse back into pure grieving. Sharp-edged, painful sorrow returned and it felt like Jack had died yesterday rather than two years previously. Depression returned. I felt rejected and unlovable. Anger would overcome me occasionally when people would offer advice they considered to be helpful to get me through my grief.

"Helpful" Advice

Some of the "helpful" advice I was given by well-meaning people follows, along with my reaction to it.

• You need to be strong.

No thanks! I'll be weak and let the Lord comfort me and heal my broken heart. Psalms 34: 18 and Matthew 5:4.

• If you grieve for more than a year, you need to seek help.

Really? there isn't a time limit on grief. This is my time to mourn, weep and heal. Ecclesiastes 3:1-4

• Crying won't fix anything.

Yes it will! Crying releases the pressure and emotional tension of grief. Tears are a part of grief and and sadness. Crying is NOT a sign of weakness. Do not let anyone tell you it's wrong to cry when you are sad. Psalm 34:18

• You need a hobby to focus on.

No, I need to focus on Jesus. Reading my Bible daily became part of my routine. I was given hope, comfort and a deeper relationship with God.

• Get on  with your life and things will get better.

Honestly, I was already living one day at a time. I did have to keep going through the motions of daily living - work, church and family. (This list is not in order of importance.) Somewhere around year 5, I realized I had gotten on with my life and things did get better. Psalm 147:3 In God's world, there is a time for everything, and season for every activity under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

In conclusion, I want to encourage everyone who has lost a loved one, to grab onto Jesus. 

Read your Bible daily. Deepen your relationship with Jesus. Grief is a journey you take one day at a time. God will be there to comfort you. 

Pray this prayer from Matthew 5:4.

Father God, I am asking you to comfort me. Your word says I will be blessed with your comfort because I am mourning the loss of _______________. I am claiming that promise. Comfort me. Fill me with peace. Take away the sharp edges of my grief. In the mighty name of Jesus, I ask this. Amen.

Psalm 34:18
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Psalm 147:3
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
Matthew 5:4
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-4
There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant, and a time to uproot,
a time to kill, and a time to heal,
a time to tear down, and a time to build,
a time to weep, and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn, and a time to dance...

Asking in Prayer - Stumbling Blocks and Solutions

Sometimes the Lord just wants us to put ourselves in park, or neutral and wait on his timing.

I have learned that stumbling blocks to answered prayer can be unbelief, sin and wrong motives

Stumbling Block 1 - Fear Causes Unbelief

Do you believe that you will receive what you are praying for? If you don't then you are praying in fear and unbelief. Nothing is too big, too small or too difficult for God. Nothing! God loves you and I. He wants to give us what we pray for when we ask him correctly. The first step in asking correctly is believing we are going to be given what we ask for. He wants us to believe that we are going to receive what we ask for in the name of Jesus.

Fear comes from Satan. Remember this acronym: False Evidence Appearing Real. You and I are the beloved children of God. We are good enough to be given what we ask for in prayer. With God, the impossible is possible. Satan loves to whisper that we aren't good enough, or that God can't possibly give us what we ask for. That is false evidence! Kick it out of your thoughts the minute you catch yourself thinking it.

Stumbling Block 2 - Sin

The sin stumbling blocks can be anger, idolatry - loving someone or something more than God, indifference to need, hypocrisy, unforgiving spirit, and broken relationships.

As a practicing alcoholic addict my personal stumbling blocks, wrong motives, and solutions were and still can be:

• Anger - Memorize, read, and recite scriptures on anger. Pray with a prayer partner before I blow up (My husband)
• Idolatry - Nothing comes before God. Not spouses, children, drugs, alcohol, food, job, nothing. God is #numberonepriority 
• Unforgiving spirit - Forgiveness comes from unconditional love. I might not like someone's actions, but I still have to forgive the person. Occasionally, this requires praying for the person you are unforgiving about to receive what they need to be happy. Do this daily for 2 weeks. 
• Broken relationships - Yes, I have to apologize for my behaviors and actions towards my fellow human beings. Courage in action is being loving and forgiving regardless of the other person's actions and behaviors. Think of Jesus stopping the stoning of the adulterous woman. Stephen asking God to forgive those stoning him to death, and Jesus on the cross asking forgiveness for those who sent him to the cross. 

How to ask in prayer - Ask with...

• Perseverance - Perseverance means having faith in and focusing on God to make sure of what He wants and what you want to ask for.
• With sincerity - Sincerity means from the heart - in love.
• With humility - Submitting to God in all areas. 
• In faith - Belief with no doubt that the power of God is present in your life.
• While abiding with Christ - Letting Jesus into your whole life, not just part of it. He is the vine and you are a branch of the vine. 
• In Jesus' name - All things come to us through Jesus. We ask in the name of Jesus and ask as Jesus would ask. What would Jesus ask for? 
• With the mind - Use your ability to phrase your prayer in a manner that is to the point, or "short and sweet." 
• In the Spirit - No selfishness or self-centeredness. 

#prayerlife #askingJesus 

"Ask and it shall be given you: seek, and you shall find: knock, and it shall be opened to you" 

John 14:6

"Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

John 14:14

"If you shall ask anything in my name, I will do it." 

John 15:7

"If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, you shall ask what you will, and it shall be done unto you" 

John 16:24

"Hitherto have you asked nothing in my name: ask, and you shall receive, that your joy may be full"

James 4:7

"Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you."

1 Peter 4:1-2

"Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because whoever suffers in the body is done with sin. As a result, they do not live the rest of their earthly lives for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God"

Ephesians 6:18

"And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord's people."

Resources

1. Prayer Guide 9, Principles of Asking, Walking in Fellowship with God - Disciple's Prayer Life by T.W. Hunt & Catherine Walker

2. Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

3. NIV Disciple's Study Bible

Verse of the Week - Galatians 2:1

How are you doing on your memorization challenge? 

Personally, I don't know how much I have memorized, but I know more about Paul and his ministry than I did before I started this challenge.

As I sat reading this week's verse, I asked myself what I could gain from this one sentence. 

1. Fourteen years is a long time to be preaching and teaching the gospel. 
2. Paul also gained supporters like Barnabus and Titus who were willing to travel with him.
3. Traveling in biblical times was quite a journey. 
4. I wonder how many folks are traveling in primitive conditions to spread the Good News of Jesus today, or to resolve an issue with leaders in the church. 

My next course of action was to read the bible commentaries about this verse.

Gill's Exposition of the Entire Bible helped me to gain a better understanding of the verse in the context of Paul's ministry.

Then fourteen years after I went up again to Jerusalem,... 

• That is, either after it pleased God to call him by his grace, and reveal his Son in him
• or after he had been at Jerusalem to see Peter, with whom he stayed fifteen days, and then went into Syria and Cilicia; 
• It was seventeen years after his conversion that he took this journey to Jerusalem he here speaks of 
• He seems to refer to the time when he and Barnabas went from the church at Antioch to the apostles and elders about the question, whether circumcision was necessary to salvation
• Acts 15:1 which entirely agrees with the account the apostle here gives of this journey, and which he went not alone

with Barnabas: and took Titus with me also

• Barnabas is mentioned in Luke's account (in Acts) as going with him at this time, but Titus is not.
• The apostle might judge it proper and prudent to take Titus with him, who was converted by him(Paul), was a minister of the Gospel, and continued uncircumcised.
• Paul might choose to have Titus along with him, partly that he might be confirmed in the faith the apostle had taught him; and partly that he might be a living testimony of the agreement between the apostle's principles and practice.
• By having Titus and Barnabas with him, he might have a competent number of witnesses to testify to the doctrines he preached, the miracles he wrought, and the success that attended him among the Gentiles; and to relate, upon their return, what passed between him and the elders at Jerusalem; for by the mouth of two or three witnesses everything is established.

"Though Paul conversed with the other apostles, yet he did not receive any addition to his knowledge, or authority, from them." Matthew Henry's Bible Commentary

Verse of the Week - Galatians 1:10

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people?
Good questions aren't they? As I grew to maturity as a branch on the Lord's vine, I had to be willing to let God prune some extra leaves and twigs from my actions and behaviors. One of behaviors that had to be pruned, or removed was my need to be a people pleaser. Yep, I had a terrible time learning that I could not please people first and God last. Below, is a list of lessons I have learned and strive to live by today.

• I can only accomplish a set number of tasks in today.
• Go to bed early and get up earlier to finish a task. I work more efficiently when I am rested. 
• It is okay to gracefully say no. Example: Thank-you so much for thinking of me. However, I already have a full calendar at that time.  Another graceful way to turn someone down is: I am so happy that you thought of me for this job, but I already have commitment(s) for that time, day, or week. 
• Giving of myself to gain approval - wanting others to recognize my contribution and give me a little pat on the head - is putting man above God. It isn't okay
• Faith requires me to go ahead and step out to do what God tells me to do, even when I feel fear. 
• There are always going to be people who don't like me and it is okay. 

Did you catch what I said about the lessons? 

I am striving, or trying, to live this way.  Am I always successful at living this way? Of course not. However, the moment I become aware that people pleasing behavior has crept back into my life, I remove it as quickly as possible through the following actions:  

First, I call on my father in heaven and ask him to remove that people pleasing sprout that has sprung up again. 

Then, I tell him I am willing to have it taken away. 

After that, I tell him that I am his to command and that I only want to do his will and not mine. The time in between each people pleasing pruning has become longer and longer as I trust my heavenly father to continue to shape me into the person he has plans for. 

If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.
To be a bold witness for Jesus, I cannot worry about pleasing people. I can only please Jesus. I am his servant and that is all the approval that I need. Jesus gave me a job to do. I have to tell others about the Good News of Jesus Christ. My Jesus loves me and cares about me. God knows me intimately and sent the Holy Spirit to live in me. I don't need any more approval than that. Amen?

Wrap Your Marriage in the Word of God

Before Bill and I were married we had several talks about what we wanted in our bible-based marriage. We discussed our marriage roles as set out in Ephesians 5:21-33.

• 21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

First, this verse doesn't say husbands and wives. It says one another, or fellow believers, out of reverence for Christ. I am going to be honest here. I had trouble with this idea. I am a strong personality and it took me awhile to realize I needed to rein myself in and yield the center of attention to others. It takes effort to consider other people, but that is what Jesus did. Out of my love for Jesus, I need to yield to my brothers, sisters, and my spouse.

• 22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 

I surrendered to the Lord completely. I love Jesus with all my heart. My life is his and my desire is to do his will. This was my relationship with Jesus before my marriage, too. However, I didn't want to surrender any control to my husband. I am a strong and independent woman who didn't want my husband to be telling me what to do.  However, this verse doesn't say my husband is going to boss me around, or be in control of me. Go back to verse 21 and reread what it says; submitting is yielding to each other because you both revere Jesus. Jesus is the authority of your faith and before your marriage you are both yielding to one another out of reverence for Jesus because you are fellow believers. At least you should be doing this. Bill looks at our marriage as a team and he wanted and wants an equal partner.

• 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

These two verses were a stumbling block for me. I can submit to Christ because he is my Savior, but I did not want to apply this to my relationship with my husband, especially the part that says,"in everything." I am going to repeat that I am a strong and independent woman who doesn't want to surrender control of my decision making to my husband. My initial reaction was, "No way is he telling me what to do!" Bill and I talked about this and the analogy he used (that made and still makes sense to me) was that of partners in Team Bonham and one partner has 51% of the shares and the other partner has 49% of the shares. Both partners will talk about the major decisions and then the partner with 51% will make the decision. Yes, I had reservations about this, but I grudgingly gave my consent to this marriage model. That was 7 years ago and I can happily tell you that Bill rarely makes a final decision unless we are in total agreement. Why? because he wants me to be happy. He places my wants and needs above his own. Which brings us to verse 25.

• 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 
• 26 to make her holy, cleansing  her by the washing with water through the word, 
• 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

Think about what these verses says and Jesus' actions. Husbands are told to love their wives in the same way Jesus loved the church. Jesus put the wants and needs of all mankind before his own. He reconciled man and God with his death upon the cross out of love. Unconditional love and grace was given to us by Jesus' sacrifice. Jesus made the church holy and blameless when each person submits to Jesus and takes their place within the body of the church. The following verses return to how husbands should love their wives. 

• 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 
• 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 
• 30 for we are members of his body.

These verses are clear as to the manner husbands should love their wives. However, I believe wives should also treat husbands in the same manner because of the opening verse, "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ." A marriage has to be balanced in the giving. If both spouses love, care, and feed each other just as Christ does the church, then both are giving of themselves to the other equally.

 Intimacy is being close to and concerned for each other other. Christ knows his church intimately and he cares for the church spiritually. Husbands are the spiritual leaders of the home. A godly husband reflects the light of Jesus through the indwelling Holy Spirit. These verses express an ideal standard that both spouses should try to achieve.  

• 31“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”

You are both on the same team. A victory for one is a victory for the other. Face each life challenge together. Support each other with unconditional love. Honestly, you cannot change each other. Get that idea out of your head. If you are single, do not go into a marriage believing you can change your spouse. You cannot change another person. All you can do is to love them as they are, just as Jesus loves you exactly where you are. More marriages end because a spouse keeps trying to change the other partner and both end up profoundly unhappy. Only God and Jesus can change someone. Pray for your partner when you are upset. Lift them up to God through Jesus and let the Lord take care of the situation. 

Note: I am not talking about abusive behavior. Do not stay in an abusive relationship. These verses say to care for your spouse as you would feed and care for your body. Abuse isn't doing this. 

• 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.  
• 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Wives, please do not speak to your husband disrespectfully at anytime. The husband is the head of the family. He is the spiritual leader of the family. Show your spouse the same respect that you would show Jesus. Again I am referring back to the opening verse,"Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ." 

Spouses must love each other as themselves and be respectful of each other. Being disrespectful to each other is destructive. It will end your chance for a happy marriage. Your spouse may "suck it up", but not forever. Sooner or later, they are going to quit trying to make you happy.  Sarcasm is another destructive way of speaking to each other. It isn't respectful or showing the reverence of Christ. 

You are going to have to communicate with your spouse. Just make sure your talks are phrased as "I messages" and not as blame. It takes practice to communicate with your spouse. It isn't going to happen overnight. However, if you are submitting to one another with the reverence of Christ, then you will be a team and learn how to be equal partners. Remember, this is why sports teams have practice - so they are working together and learning to act as one.  

Another set of scripture that Bill and I adopted as our "marriage scriptures" is this one:

Two are better than one,

because they have a good return for their labor:

10If either of them falls down,

one can help the other up.

But pity anyone who falls

and has no one to help them up.

11Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.

But how can one keep warm alone?

12 Though one may be overpowered,

two can defend themselves.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken   Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

In verse 12, the cord of three strands is the Lord, your spouse, and you. You are one cord made of three strands that is not quickly broken. Just make sure that the Lord is the first strand, your spouse is the second strand, and you are the third strand. 

I want you to know that what I have written is not professional help. I'm not a counselor. What I am is a spirit-filled, child of God who is relating how my godly husband and I have based our marriage upon the bible. Our marriage is seven years old and our "honeymoon" period has not ended. We put the Lord first, each other second, and then ourselves every day.  We have followed the biblical marriage model from the first day of our marriage and it is working for us. My hope is that you will try this biblical marriage model and strengthen your marriage too. 

My Word for 2018 is Jesus, or a Christian New Year's Resolution

Hello all,
You may have noticed that I haven't posted a lot from Dec.4 to Dec. 31. I spent the holiday season focusing on family, friends, and holiday events. However, today is the beginning of a new year and it is time to begin writing again.
I read a post on "Out of the Ashes", a FB public group, that was asking the members to post one word for 2018 as they received their word through prayer. 

My word was immediately given to me - Jesus.  Jesus the Messiah, Jesus the Redeemer, Jesus the Teacher, Jesus the Servant, Jesus the Fisher of Men, Jesus the Sacrificial Lamb, Jesus the Healer, Jesus the Son of God, Jesus the Lord of my Life.
Jesus is in the beginning, middle, and end of my day.
That doesn't mean I don't fall short of his example though. I do. Daily. It is so hard to walk down the narrow path of faith and think of myself as a stranger in this life. I find myself concerned with things that have no bearing on my life as a follower of Jesus.

My actions and behaviors do not always reflect the loving light of Jesus Christ. So what do I do?

1. Ask for Jesus to help me and strengthen my ability to reflect his love and lifestyle as a servant of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit every day. 
2. Stop beating myself up mentally when I fall short and do my best to not repeat the error. Let the error teach me and not condemn me. Condemnation is Satan trying to widen the gap between myself and Jesus. I am not letting him succeed. 
3. Focus on what I am doing right. This simple activity will increase my spiritual connection with the Lord and keep Satan from trapping me into thoughts of condemnation. 
4. Evaluate my activities regularly and not let myself get caught up in busyness that stops me from reading my bible, meditating on the bible, and being a servant. This isn't an excuse to skip out on what the Lord calls me to do, but a way to keep me from getting caught up in activities that don't serve Jesus in anyway. 
5. I need to be a servant of the Lord that is actively asking people if they know Jesus and not a busy part of an organization that isn't fulfilling the needs of orphans, widows, homeless, and hurting people. Unconditional love for the unlovable is part of being a new person filled with the Holy Spirit.
6. Read my bible regularly. All of the bible, not just part of the bible. The bible is the "Sword of the Spirit" and can teach me how to think, act, and keep my mind focused on the new woman that I am. I will grow spiritually this way and begin to find myself speaking the word in my daily life, not quoting, but speaking the word as naturally as breathing. 

Jesus is my word and my way of life for 2018. 

I will continue to be a coheir of the kingdom of God and do my best to reflect the unconditional love and light as a follower of Jesus Christ. 

The Holy Spirit is my counselor, the bible is my instructional manual, and my Jesus will strengthen me to be his servant. 

Happy New Year and may the Lord bless you and keep you through the coming year,
Sallee Bonham

A Joy Filled Woman

Washed by Jesus - John 13:8

Jesus taught by example.
Can you see the servant king kneeling  before each of his disciples so he could wash their feet? I wonder how each of them felt as they watched Jesus wash their brother's feet?  He laid aside self-seeking and practiced self-sacrifice. He laid aside pride and practiced love.
Let Jesus kneel down before you and wash your feet. 
He wants to be closer to you. You don't have to pay the bills, cook meals, work 12 hours a day, or work on your car alone.
Come on, let Jesus wash away your dirt and stains. He is waiting to wash your sin dirt away. Even the stubborn stains will yield to his cleansing wash. Do not be stubborn and say, "I can do it myself!" You can do it yourself, however you won't know Jesus.
Come on, what are you waiting for?
You can be washed in the water of Jesus' love and forgiveness. Jesus knows how hard it is to lay down your burden. After all, "I can do it myself!" are some of the first words a toddler learns to say. My mom tells me that my first words were,"Do it myself!"
Jesus is a servant king.
He is a king waiting for his brothers and sisters to come to him, weary from their travels through this life, dirty and stained. He is waiting for you, holding a bowl of water and a washcloth in his hands, waiting and ready to wash away the grit and grime of your journey.
Jesus knows what I am and loves me anyway. 
I was an unbeliever, who wanted to do everything myself. I started out with a foundation laid upon Jesus, thanks to my mom. However, I left that behind at the ripe old age of 17. Yes, I had plans for my life. Military service, drinking, drugs, physical relationships, broken marriages, and children were all a part of my plan.
I sought things that made me feel good, but that feeling of being content just didn't stay with me for long until I finally decided that I needed Jesus to help me. Yes, I let Jesus wash the stains and grime from my heart and soul when I surrendered my life to Jesus.

Jesus knows the idols and influences on my life: money, advertisements for alcohol filled with attractive people having a good time, my computer that is a gateway into all sorts of enticements, a tendency to gossip, be sarcastic, and a nasty temper.

But then I accepted Jesus' offer to be washed clean from the dirt and stains that were clinging to me.
I accepted where I was at in life and where I was at in my relationship with Jesus. Yes, Jesus was right there, waiting for me to accept his help. So I say, "What are you waiting for? Get up, get baptized, and wash your sins away, calling on his name."

Do you already know Jesus? Then come on, let him sit at your feet and wash the grit and grime from this world off of you.

Acts 22:16
And now what are you waiting for? Get up, get baptized, and wash your sins away, calling on His name.'
1 Corinthians 12:2
"You know that when you were pagans, you were influenced and led astray by mute idols."
Ephesians 2:2
in which you used to walk when you conformed to the ways of this world and of the ruler of the power of the air, the spirit who is now at work in the sons of disobedience."

Paul's 2nd Corinthian Letter - Week 4

Chapter 11

Paul and the False Apostles

I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. 11:2

• Paul is in the role of an earthly father who has engaged the saints to be married to Christ. 
• The church cannot follow anyone except Christ in order to remain a pure virgin. 

Paul was concerned that the church's minds could be led astray from their sincere and pure devotion to Christ, as Eve was deceived by the serpent's cunning. 11:3

Paul wasn't a "Super-apostle" 11:5

• Paul wasn't a trained speaker, but he had knowledge.
• Paul reassured the Corinthian church he wasn't wanting their money.
• Paul's sole desire was that they know Jesus.

Because Satan can hide himself as an angel of light, so can his servants. 11:13-11:15

• Paul points out that Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light.
• It shouldn't be surprising that Satan's servants masquerade as servants of righteousness, but their end will be what they deserve.
• The followers of Jesus shouldn't be surprised to find Satan's servants hiding themselves among the righteous. What better way to cause strife and disharmony than to masquerade as a faithful believer? 
• Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Matthew 7:15
• For I know this, that after my departing shall grievous wolves enter in among you, not sparing the flock. Acts 20:29

"Hypocrisy may be looked for especially when we consider the great power which Satan...has upon the minds of many.Satan will allow his ministers to preach either the law or the gospel separately" Matthew Henry's Concise Bible Commentary

 The law as established by faith in Christ's righteousness and atonement, and the partaking of his Spirit is the test of every false system.  Matthew Henry

Paul shares about his sufferings and service as a minister of Jesus Christ. 11:16-11:30

• Paul endured the following situations to the honor of God:

1. received 40 stripes 5 times save 1
2. beaten with rods 3 times
3. stoned once
4. shipwrecked 3 times
5. adrift at sea a night and a day

• Paul faced many perils during his journeys.

1. waters
2. robbers
3. his own countrymen
4. from the heathens
5. in the city
6. in the wilderness
7. in the sea
8. among false brothers

Even though Paul was in peril and endured great hardship, he still considered the care of all the churches.

"It astonishes us to reflect on this account of his dangers, hardships, and sufferings, and to observe his patience, perseverance, diligence, cheerfulness, and usefulness, in the midst of all these trials."  Matthew Henry's Concise Bible Commentary

Chapter 12

 Paul's Revelation 12:1-12:5

• The church is built on the foundation of Paul's revelation
• Paul is about to tell, or show the greatest of his infirmities and he didn't want to tell more of his revelation because it might encourage them to focus more on him than on his teachings. 12:6

Paul's Thorn and God's Grace 12:7-12:10

• No one knows what Paul's "thorn in the flesh" was.
• Paul's attitude about it shows he accepted it as a way for him to remain humble.
• He asked, in prayer, to be relieved of his "thorn in the flesh," but accepted that this was not God's plan.
• God told Paul that his grace was sufficient.
• God's strength is made perfect in weakness.

When we continue to praise God and accept his plan, as Jesus accepted his Father's plan, we are made strong in our weakness because we rely on God through Jesus Christ.

"Prayer is a salve for every sore, a remedy for every malady; and when we are afflicted with thorns in the flesh, we should give ourselves to prayer." Matthew Henry

Concern for the Corinthian Church 12:11 - 12:21

• These verses show the character of a faithful minister of the gospel.
• These verses also show the excesses the false teachers had taken their deluded followers to.
•  Christians should be sad that evils should be found among teachers of the gospel. 
• Evils have been found in teachers of the gospel too often, but it has been so since the days of the apostles.  

Chapter 13

Examine Yourselves 13:1 - 13:10

• Paul addressed the church at Corinth 3 times and by the third time he was losing his patience with the sinners. 
• Those who continued to question Paul's authority were those who had the least reason to question him. They had seen the signs and wonders of his apostleship.
• In verse 13:3, the church members wanted and demanded proof that the voice and power of Christ was in Paul. Paul directs them to self examination, to try, prove, and recognize their own souls. If things were right, they'd find proof of Christ's speaking in him. 

Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Cant you see for yourselves the Jesus Christ is in you-unless you actually fail the test? 13:5

• Paul desired that the body of the church be kept from sin and they would grow in grace and holiness.
• They should know if Christ was in them, but the indwelling of His spirit.
• We are either true Christians, or we are deceivers.
• Unless Christ is in us by his Spirit and power of his love, our faith is dead.

Final Greetings and Blessings  13:11 - 13:14

Do these things and the God of love and Peace shall be with you:

• Be perfect
• Be of good comfort
• Be of one mind
• Live in peace

The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the communion of the Holy Ghost be with you all. Amen.

My hope is that you have prospered spiritually during this 4 week bible study. Thank-you for joining me. SalleeB

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 29

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 28

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 27

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 26

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 22

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 19

30 Days of Thanksgiving - Day 18

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 6

30 Days of Thankfulness - Day 5

Do Encourage Converted Sinners - Acts 9:26-27

Acts 9:26-27
And when Saul was come to Jerusalem, he assayed to join himself to the disciples: but they were all afraid of him, and believed not that he was a disciple.  But Barnabas took him, and brought him to the apostles, and declared to them how he had seen the Lord in the way, and that he had spoken to him, and how he had preached boldly at Damascus in the name of Jesus. 

When great and notorious sinners profess to be converted - people who have been violent, artful, or malignant - it is natural to ask whether they have not some unworthy motive still in their professed change. 

Confidence is a plant of slow growth, and starts up, not by a sudden profession, but is the result of a course of life which is worthy of affection and of trust.                Barnes' Notes on the Bible 

Saul had been gone for three years before he showed up in Jerusalem wanting to join the disciples. 
The disciples hadn't heard much about Saul's conversion, or any subsequent preaching. Therefore, they were afraid of him because they weren't sure about his conversion. Saul had been the number one persecutor of the new believers in Jesus. Now, here he was wanting to join them. 
Barnabas Stood With Saul
Barnabas, the Son of Encouragement, decided to stand with Saul and to encourage the disciples to believe in what had happened to Saul. Barnabus related what he knew about Saul and felt that Saul was truly a changed man. How different the bible story might be if Barnabus hadn't stood and encouraged the disciples to accept Saul! 
My husband's testimony affects people because he dealt with an abusive father until he was ten years old. 
In turn, Bill passed on the pain by being a bully. As an adult, he was an aggressive, alcoholic-addict who liked to show people he was powerful. He ended up in an outlaw motorcycle club where his personality fit in with the lifestyle. Bill is the first to tell you that he was not a nice person. 
When Bill retired, he moved to southern Missouri and bought some land in the Irish Wilderness. 
Bill didn't know that this area had a rural church with active disciples of Jesus in it who were his neighbors. Bill said he couldn't even pick up a hammer without a neighbor showing up offering to help. His neighbors wouldn't accept money. They only asked that he think about coming to church. In Bill's world, obligations needed to be paid off. 
Eventually, he went to church several times. God touched Bill and he ended up answering an alter call. After that alter call, Bill joined the church through baptism in a local river. 
Today, Bill is an evangelist for Jesus Christ. 
He never meets someone without asking them if they are a Christian, or if they know Jesus Christ. He even does this on every phone call that he receives. I sometimes find myself wondering if Saul might not have been a lot like Bill after he met Jesus on the road to Damascus. 
Saul spent the rest of his life serving the Lord and  my husband is doing the same.
I think this illustrates that no matter how bad a person is in the world, God can turn them into his greatest followers. No matter how bad you think you are, God wants you. Tell Jesus that you want him in your life today. Tell Jesus you know you have done bad, but want to change your life.  Find a church and talk to the pastor. 
As Barnabus stood with Saul and vouched for his conversion, God will send someone to help you.