Change is hard for me to deal with - leaving it up to Jesus is easy to say, hard to do. For a week or so, I have been alternating between acceptance, sadness, and anger. The Serenity prayer has come to mind two or three times.
God grant me the serenityto accept the things I cannot changethe courage to change the things I canand the wisdom to know the difference.The moment the Lord spoke to my heart I should have let things go, but I keep picking at the issue like a child picking at a scab on a healing sore until the sore is bleeding again.
The position change is not a demotion. My head knows this, my heart doesn't. Part of the problem is that I love my job. Yes, LOVE it. The satisfaction is part of what keeps me going even though the pay is low.
The department I am being sent to isn't quite the same. The five previous years I spent in that department had me feeling burnt out. The gains and goals were much lower. However, you can see that I am still trying to weigh the pros and cons.
The pros and cons keep bouncing around in my head even though the Lord spoke to my heart and told me to stay and it is not time to change. He always has a plan for his beloved, even when I can't see it. My finite brain trying to understand an infinite God just doesn't work. Acceptance is the answer. HE has spoken.
As the refrain from the old hym says, "Trust and obey, for there’s no other way, To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey."
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.