A New Term - Spiritual Dyslexia
Bill was in the living room, watching Andrew Wommack's daily program on TV. I was in the kitchen, completely focused on my computer screen. I could hear Andrew Wommack's words, but I wasn't listening. Shopping for birthday presents at Amazon.com was all I was paying attention to. The barely heard words from the living room were not enough to distract me. Suddenly, two words sank through my focus. Spiritual dyslexia. What could that be? Curious now, I grabbed my notebook and pen before joining Bill in the living room.
What is Spiritual Dyslexia?
Spiritual dyslexia is having a backwards relationship with God. You believe you have to follow God's word to earn God's love. Keeping God's law = having God's love.
The Law, or Legalism
The Old Testament set out rules the Jewish people were to follow because they were God's people. Their sins were forgiven through sacrifices. Each sin had rules for how to make a sacrifice to atone for the sin. God's people achieved righteousness by following the rules and making the appropriate sacrifices. They did not live under grace, they lived under the law.
A Spiritually Dyslexic Rule Follower
I am a rule follower. Give me directions to read, and I will happily read them all the way through. Then, I will follow the directions. The 10 Commandments and the Golden Rule were what I had been taught to follow to be a good person. I tried hard to be good. Every time I broke a rule, or failed to follow directions, I felt guilty. I wasn't good enough and sin was winning. After awhile, I gave up on trying to be good and just tried to make it through each day the best I could. Sin was ruling my life and guilt was weighing me down.
Born Again and Still Spiritually Dyslexic
When I was born again, I was happy for awhile. However, I still wasn't able to follow the rules and the guilt came crashing back in. I was suffering from spiritual dyslexia and didn't know it. My day began with thanking God for everything and asking to do his will. Then, I tried to follow the rules - the 10 Commandments and the Golden Rule. Following rules isn't a bad thing. However, I didn't realize that God doesn't need me to follow rules to achieve salvation. I am living under grace, or the new way of the Spirit and first, God wants me to love him. Then, that love will cause me to
want to do his will with all my heart. To further complicate my misunderstanding, I blamed myself for not being able to be good.
But now, by dying to what once bound us, we have been released from the law so that we serve in the new way of the Spirit, and not in the old way of the written code.
Romans 7:6 NIV
My Personal Revelation and Cure
My life changing moment happened one morning after I had to discipline my children. Repeatedly I said to them, "I will always love you, but your choices are why you are in trouble." Afterwards, a silent explosion of new knowledge occurred inside me.
God loves me the same way I love my children. No matter what they do, I love them. I don't love their choices, but it does not change how I love them.
I started to understand God's grace. God loves me no matter what I do. He does hold me responsible for my choices, but He continues to love me. I am safe and secure in God's love. I do not have to earn love by following rules;I have love so I want to follow the rules. My life hasn't been the same since I had that revelation.
"Make level paths for your feet," so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed. Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.
Hebrews 12: 13-15
Having God's Love = Obeying God's Word
I no longer worry about not being "good enough" for Jesus. I have always been good enough. Today my desire is to do God's will in all things,
because I know He loves me unconditionally. Jesus is the model for my behavior and relationships. Occasionally I have a bad day, but prayer, meditation, and Bible study keep my path level.
We know that we have come to know him if we obey his commands. The man who says, "I know him," but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him: Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did.
1 John 2:3-6 NIV